The passing of an Indigenous elder and the subsequent discord between family, community members and governance around her burial ceremony turned into an 18-month nightmare of spiritual suppression and social ostracization for an Indigenous woman on the tiny Southwestern Ontario reserve at Cape Croker.
Emerging from that dark time, Sheila Robson is sharing her harrowing experience of being criminally charged and socially snubbed following a traditional cremation ceremony for her mother-in-law.
What began as a sacred cultural ceremony in January 2024 spiralled into a community-wide conflict, with Robson and two others facing multiple criminal charges.
The subsequent shunning has stripped her of her community connections, professional work, and, ultimately, her marriage, she said.
Her story reveals some of the ongoing challenges faced by Indigenous individuals who seek to maintain traditional practices in the face of institutional resistance.
On March 6, 2025, after over a year of uncertainty and fear, Robson was cleared of all charges against her before the matter got to trial.
Robson is now speaking out about her experience, hoping that by sharing her truth, she may be able to reclaim her self-worth, identify gaps in the mental health system and perhaps even save lives.
On January 4, 2024, Robson participated in a traditional Indigenous cremation ceremony for her mother-in-law, a respected minister in the United Church. She says the ceremony involved approximately 50 participants from various First Nations and religious backgrounds and was profoundly spiritual and carefully conducted.
The ceremonial fire burned for four days, following Indigenous protocols and conducted with what Robson described as “love in our hearts.”
However, this sacred ceremony became the catalyst for significant community conflict. Her mother-in-law’s brother, who was also the community’s chief, publicly criticized the ceremony on social media, leading to widespread community condemnation and ultimately criminal charges against Robson, her husband, and the ceremony conductor for alleged indignity to a body.
“I have no regrets,” Robson said. “I would have went through that whole experience again, if I had to, it was something that my mother-in law-had talked about and wanted for her.”
Robson described the community chief’s subsequent actions, which she says were sanctioned by the band council, as helping to create what she described as a mob mentality against her.
She said “the chief of our community put out a statement and wrote a letter, and he posted it on Facebook, social media, for everyone to see. And when he did that, community reacted. They believed everything that he said. There became this mob mentality towards anyone that had anything to do with the ceremony. And we were attacked. We were attacked harshly in the public eye, in social media. And there was outrage.”
A Jan. 10, 2024 notice posted to the Chippewas of Nawash Unceded First Nation website indicated support services were being offered after an elder was cremated outside the customs of the First Nation.
“Chief and Council does not condone the actions of the individuals that organized this cremation. This is not the tradition or practice of our people,” the Jan. 10 notice said.
In another statement posted on behalf of the family members the same day, Chief Greg Nadjiwon said, “As a family, we are deeply saddened by the actions of those who organized and undertook the indignity to my sister’s remains. What began as a celebration of life, a sharing of love and life was turned into a mockery in regard to the honour and respect of our beloved deceased.”
Then, says Robson, she was shunned. She says community leaders instructed people to “shun” her, cutting her off from social services, community meetings and events, and professional networks.
People stopped waving, making eye contact, or communicating with Robson in any way. The discord spread like wildfire across her traditional and social networks.
With tears streaming down her face, Robson described what unfolded as “spiritual gaslighting.”
“So when it was put out there on Facebook that we were being shunned, and in the community, we were being shunned, and people were turning their backs on us, not looking at, not talking to us, not communicating with us, that was really hard on my family, all of this not only affected myself personally and my mental health. It affected my children.
“My children were not comfortable in taking my grandson out into the community, because people would be whispering. People would be mouthing off and saying things, at a distance of course, and people would be making comments in the community centre, at the powwow, you know, any events that my children had gone to and taken my grandson, and I could only hope that my grandson didn’t hear what those people were saying.”
The conditions placed on Robson after being formally charged on March 14, 2024 worsened the already uncomfortable shunning situation, effectively cutting her off from everybody and everything she held dear. She said she was prohibited from communicating directly and indirectly with an extensive list of people in her community.
Robson said she lost her job working with Native Child Welfare programs, was removed from community leadership roles and was prevented from participating in cultural ceremonies.
Despite her long-standing ceremonial practices, people began questioning her spiritual credentials, attacking her Indigenous spiritual identity.
“People who I thought, and I need to say it this way, people I thought that knew me, but they didn’t, okay. I was not able to access social services to get support for my family. I was not able to go to any community meetings, community events, or anything community.”
Robson said no one sought her side of the story, believing instead the social media narratives without investigation. She feels that they abandoned the traditional principles of community dialogue and understanding.
She said one community member who attended the cremation ceremony spoke out in Robson’s defence but got in trouble. “The police questioned her. The police went around and started asking questions because of the mob mentality created.”
Robinson said “Grandmothers and aunties” from the community who once stood by her side disappeared and offered no support during her emotional distress. Community and mental health support disappeared.
Robson did still have one person who supported her during this difficult time, an elder who was instrumental in her sobriety and healing journey. Vera Whiteye Jones was her “auntie grandma mom,” her passing left Robson feeling even more isolated.
“My auntie mom died. She was my teacher. She was my everything,” Robson said. “She taught me a lot of what I know. She took me places, and she helped me on my healing journey. When she left, I was devastated.”
After her husband was removed from the reserve, ultimately leaving her alone with her youngest daughter in an isolated situation, Robson says harassing behaviour ensued. For instance, she said, “The police followed me around. I got stopped by the police because my windows were tinted and that’s what (the police officer) told me. It was because there were rumours going around on the reserve that my husband was on the reserve, which he was not, he was not on the reserve,” Robson stated.
Although Robson has been clean and sober for 24 years, returning to her addictions did cross her mind during this incredibly trying experience. Thoughts of leaving this world altogether by suicide also plagued her in her isolation.
“I had contemplated suicide three times throughout my life and attempted twice,” Robson said quietly, with tears streaming down her cheeks. “The darkness came back. And I fought with everything in my being to stay here. My grandson saved my life. Where would he be if I left? … I can’t go anywhere because I have children. I have a grandson, and I’m supposed to be a helper to Creator, so I was fighting for my life, to help me. I fell through the mental health cracks. I didn’t trust anybody. I fought with everything in my being to stay here, to share this story, because people need to know you could be attacked by your own people.”
Through her spiritual connection to the ancestors, her ceremonial experiences, and the love of a few close family members, Robson has managed to survive. Finding herself standing alone once more, having lost her marriage to this situation, she is like an emerging butterfly from a silky cocoon on the other side of the ordeal strong, resilient, and ready to take on whatever the Creator has in store for her next.
“My truth is my protection, and I have a voice. I choose to keep moving forward, taking care of myself,” Robson said, her deep brown eyes shining with an electrifying energy. “Everything happens for a reason, and we never know why, until down the road.”
She still lives a ceremonial life in solitude, and spending time alone in the bush; communing with nature and her ancestors has been her saving grace.
“I do my own ceremonies and making my offerings. That has not stopped. I’m giving thanks,” she said. “I have many bundles that I carry, many things that I do. I look after spirits. I look after plants. I feast the animals, and I feast all of those spirits, you know, from the other worlds, other realms, if you will. And I had to do it on my own.”
Robson said, “I think it’s really important for people to know that our ancestors are real, and they listen to us when we ask. I feel like she’s protected me the whole time and has been helping me the whole time from the spirit world.
“I talked to my auntie all the time while I was in isolation and I specifically asked her to help me and I told her ‘you’re a powerful spirit in the spirit world can you please talk to the ancestors of those that are condemning me and tell them to tell their loved ones to drop all the charges against me’ and that happened on March 6, 2025, which is significant because that is my auntie Gramma mom’s birthday. She spoke loud on that day, and I was freed from all charges against me. I did a ceremony on that day and honoured her in the way that she taught me and I was overwhelmed and emotional that day and I did a lot of healing that day.”
Personal healing ceremonies and ongoing spiritual maintenance became Robson’s form of resistance and healing.
“I know I am love, I know I am light, I know I’m energy,” she said. “I’m pure energy. I know my energy is big.”
In the aftermath of community rejection and personal trauma, Robson has emerged not as a victim but as evidence of Indigenous resilience.
Her journey reveals the complex challenges facing Indigenous communities in preserving cultural practices and individual dignity.
Through her unwavering dedication to ceremony, self-healing, and spiritual connection, Robson transformed a narrative of oppression into a powerful statement of survival.
Her story transcends personal experience, challenging systemic racism and the ongoing colonization of Indigenous spiritual practices.
As she continues her healing journey, Robson’s spiritual integrity and personal strength can withstand even the most profound attempts at cultural erasure.
“Creator has me here for a reason,” she declared, a reflective reminder that resilience is not just about surviving but about reclaiming one’s fundamental right to exist, practice, and thrive.
All My Relations
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Cory Bilyea is an Indigenous journalist working for Midwestern Newspapers. She is a member of the Six Nations of the Grand River, better known as Onkwehonwe, the original people. Cory is a survivor of intergenerational trauma caused by residential schools. She can be reached at cbilyea@midwesternnewspapers.com.
