It all started with a life isn’t going my way fit. Maybe you’ve witnessed one of these fits lately or maybe you’ve had one yourself. No judgment here; life doesn’t seem to be going the way most people would prefer it to these days, and regardless of age, we all have fits now and again.
My middle son was no exception. He wanted to go fishing and that was just fine, but the way he wanted to fish had just been given the red light by his dad.
I woke up at 7 a.m. to my husband’s calm but stern voice declaring, “No, you can’t use all the fish food as bait. You will have to find different bait if you want to fish today.” I’m thankful that was my wakeup because what followed would have been much more of a shocking jolt out of bed.
A loud, frustrated yell came from my sweet son’s mouth and then, “I don’t want to use different bait!! I want to use the fish food!!!” was screamed into the front door of my home and made its way to every single room in our house.
The door slammed hard and my husband exited to diffuse the bomb that may have already exploded in our home. I had a feeling he was heading out to confiscate the fishing pole. Regardless, there was no sleeping in.
A few minutes later, everything had calmed down, thankfully. My son then came bursting into the house with a smile on his face and an excitement that could barely be contained. He was beyond thrilled to share what he had just found while digging for worms. He opened his hands to show me and his brothers this cute little spotted salamander.
We hadn’t found salamanders on our property before so he was absolutely beaming to be the first one to do it. His smile said it all. After each of us had a turn to look at it, and snap some pictures, he left to place the little creature – now named ‘Spots’ – back where he had found it.
My husband got up from the breakfast table and followed behind him again, this time to share the wisdom he later shared with the rest of us. He said, “Sometimes we throw a fit when a door closes in our life. But sometimes that closed door leads us to a place we never would have ventured had the door not closed.”
Graham is always teaching life lessons. So am I. Our kids are pretty used to it and they all understood this one; the salamander was only found because worms were the only option for bait. Otherwise, Levi never would have made this exciting discovery.
As I listened, I recollected the number of times in my life I had sat down in front of a recently closed door and had my own version of a life isn’t going my way fit. I’m not ashamed to admit I’ve had a few. I can relate to the frustration of having a door I was banking on walking through slammed in my face instead. My husband went on to explain to all of us that closed doors may look crappy in the moment, and feel extremely frustrating, but they can be opportunities in disguise.
We get to choose what to do when the door closes. That choice could lead to amazing discoveries and adventures or it could lead to us deciding to give up entirely. We all get to choose how we respond.
Levi could have thrown in the fishing rod and decided to pout about not getting his own way. He could have let the circumstances cause him to quit.
He had to make the choice to go out and accept the circumstances and find a way to still make fishing possible.
We don’t always know what opportunity a closed door can bring us until we are willing to get up from our pity party and find a new way to get to where we were hoping to go.
Over the years I’ve witnessed a lot of people experience weight loss frustration. That darn scale sure has a way of slamming a door in people’s faces. That said, it is those who soldier on despite setbacks who succeed at achieving their weight-loss goals. Those who never give up trying always find a new way around whatever obstacle or hurdle has been thrown in front of them and ultimately learn a lot about themselves and weight loss in the process.
Many have even discovered new careers and passions because they chose not to give up when weight loss wasn’t going their way. Some have inspired others to get healthier simply because they did.
Almost all have had new opportunities unfold as a direct or indirect result of successfully losing the weight and maintaining a healthy lifestyle; all because they never gave up trying.
Life isn’t linear. Sometimes our destination gets barricaded. Rather than sitting down in the middle of the street and crying about the road block (it is OK to do that once in a while too) we can choose to get back up, try again, learn something new and find a different way to get there. When we do, we may just discover something we never would have, had we not found a way to carry on. Detours can often be the most scenic routes but we never discover them if we aren’t first willing to be brave enough to keep going.
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This is a monthly opinion piece; Alison Brown is a local business owner, mother and published author.
