Football fans across North America were glued to their television sets on the weekend, engorging themselves in the offerings of the National Football League (NFL).
I, as an avid fan of football… OK, who am I kidding? I watch, at most, two games per year – the Grey Cup and the Super Bowl.
My favourite team? The one I have money on in the friendly Grey Cup or Super Bowl pool.
Do I understand what the announcers are talking about when they speak of blitzes, pass rushes and shotgun formations? Nope. I believe I understand Mandarin better than football lingo.
I watch a game and ask myself, “Why do they keep running up the middle of the field? That guy is wide open over there!”
So given my honest and open feelings about my football fandom, why did I find myself watching the Buffalo Bills and Kansas City Chiefs game on Sunday night?
It’s not because I am a “Swiftie” – a fan of pop star Taylor Swift, who is dating a guy who catches a ball quite well, based on what I have gathered.
Part of the reason I turned the game on is because my wife, a Fort Erie native, wanted to see if the Bills would finally get over the hurdle and one step closer to the Super Bowl.
The other reason is that the Toronto Maple Leafs game didn’t start until 9 p.m.
Things started out well for the Bills. They had the lead, then lost it, then had it again, then lost it, then had it again… then something to do with what football aficionados call “passer interference” meant that Kansas City got a first down instead of going to fourth down. In hockey, that play would not have been called interference, but I digress…
As we watched the Bills trudge down the frozen tundra in Buffalo, my wife turned to me and asked, “How does the NFL ensure Buffalo loses this game, so Taylor can come back next week?”
Usually I am the pessimist when it comes to these types of situations. However, “doom scrolling” on social media can make a pessimist out of any of us.
“Oh, I am sure something is coming,” I replied.
Call it fate, call it choking, or call it whatever you like, but the Buffalo Bills managed to lose the football game.
There was an “incomplete pass” that, in the eyes of this very amateur football rules official, I would have ruled a completion followed by a fumble and recovery – a play that, if ruled a complete pass, would have put Buffalo in prime scoring position.
Late in the fourth, there was a field goal attempt for the Bills that would have tied the game. The kicker missed “wide right,” which the football fans in this office tell me is something the Bills have done before and are known for. I could have looked it up online, but I don’t care that much…
Then, for whatever reason, the last 90 seconds of the game were spent kneeling and shaking hands… handing Kansas City the win. Not sure why this is allowed to happen – can you imagine the final minute of a hockey game spent with the goalie just holding the puck? – but it does, and I am also told this is common in football.
In the end, the Bills lost, I moved on, and turned on the hockey game.
“Poor Bills,” my wife said.
“They lose quite regularly, right?” I asked.
She then regaled me with stories of the Bills making the Super Bowl when she was younger, and how they lost those games too.
“It’s like the NFL version of being a Leafs fan,” she said.
Now this I can relate to.
“Great regular season team, can’t win a game when it counts?” I asked.
She nodded, and we then gasped as we noticed Ilya Samsonov – my oldest gave him the nickname “Swiss Cheese” due to his ability to allow any puck to pass through him – was playing net for the Leafs against Seattle.
Yes… we are attracted to underachievers when it comes to sports teams, and the pain and suffering is real.
And in a few months, we’ll be chanting, “Let’s go Blue Jays” as they leave eight runners on base and lose 2-1 to the Oakland A’s…
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Mike Wilson is the editor of Midwestern Newspapers. Comments and feedback are welcome at mwilson@midwesternnewspapers.com.
