For the majority of my life, I have been outnumbered by men.
I grew up with two older brothers, played on multiple boys’ sports teams as a child, and fast forward to the present, I work in a male dominated industry with predominantly men in my newsroom.
Don’t confuse my writing for complaining, I have been lucky enough to be surrounded by wonderful men in my life – with my husband topping the list.
My spouse loves to joke about the boys in our house running the show as my son, who I must add is the splitting image of his father, will almost always side with him in any tiebreaker disagreement.
A common tiebreaker in our home is deciding where to order takeout from. I could want a burger and fries – my son’s favourite dinner – while Stephen’s vote could be for Chinese food. My son will side with his father even though he does not like Chinese food and likely won’t touch what we put on his plate.
Even our male dog Ghost – who I fought my husband to get, picked him out of his litter, and even named him – more often than not goes to my husband first.
My only dig at my husband is the only other lady in my home – our beloved older dog, Rosie. She was my husband’s dog for years during his bachelor days before we met, but since our introduction she has truly been my shadow and best friend.
I often say to Rosie we are outnumbered so it is important us girls stick together. Well, I’m not going to let her stray very far, but that long lost battle is coming to a stalemate.
As you read this column, I am in my 22nd week of pregnancy with our second child, and the doctor has told us it looks to be a girl.
Finally some balance in our home – three girls (myself, my daughter and Rosie) against three boys (my husband, my son and Ghost).
I am extremely excited but this is untravelled waters for me and with it, brings some uncertainty.
Like I wrote before, I have been lucky to be surrounded by wonderful men in my family, career, and friendships. My son Lucas, albeit a wild child at times, has been a pleasure to raise and nurture.
I remember feeling a sense of calm come over me when I found out my first born child would be a boy. It was what I had always dreamed of. A big brother to look out for the younger siblings, just the same as what I had growing up.
Although I am over the moon excited for our next child, I am nervous about being a mother to a girl.
They say girls are easier to potty train, and often surpass newborn milestones quicker than boys do – but I also know first hand the hard parts about being a girl.
Girls can be down right mean to their friends and peers. The young female tactics of gossiping and silent treatments verge on the side of physiological warfare at times.
It is downright hard to be a girl sometimes.
I expressed my unsettling feelings to a dear friend of mine – who happens to be a mother of two beautiful girls – and I begged her to share her secrets.
She said she felt the same as me when she was pregnant, but everyday she tries to focus on the fact that she has the chance to raise good girls and hopefully balance out the odds of future young ladies going through the same hardships we went through. Or perhaps, our daughters can provide a strong shoulder for their friends to cry on.
There is a saying I have loved for many years, but I could never really put my finger on why. As I write this column I feel it suits my theme and could close out my thoughts nicely.
“Here’s to strong women. May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.”
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Kelsey Bent is a journalist with Midwestern Newspapers. She can be reached for comments by emailing kbent@midwesternnewspapers.com.
