The cowbell.
Traditionally, this bell is worn around the neck of free-roaming livestock so herders can keep track of any animal via the sound of the bell.
It is also a common musical instrument, used in several popular songs, including “(Don’t Fear) The Reaper” by Blue Oyster Cult.
The aforementioned song was the subject of one of Saturday Night Live’s more memorable skits, “More Cowbell,” featuring Will Ferrell, Christopher Walken, Jimmy Fallon, Chris Kattan, Chris Parnell and Horatio Sanz.
To summarize the skit for those who have not seen it, producer Bruce Dickinson (played by Walken) tells Blue Oyster Cult they have “what appears to be a dynamite sound.” The first take seems to go well but the band stops playing because the cowbell part is rather loud and distracting. Dickinson, to the surprise of most of the band, asks for “a little more cowbell” and suggests that the cowbell player, Gene Frenkle (Ferrell), “really explore the studio space this time.”
Frenkle’s exuberance in following this advice causes him to bump into his bandmates as he dances around the cramped studio, thrusting his pelvis wildly in all directions, and the band aborts another take.
In the end, tempers flare, and Dickinson utters this gem of a line:
“Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription… is more cowbell!”
In the end, the band agrees to let him play the cowbell part his way, and recording goes off without a hitch.
Until recently, I had no idea there was cowbell in “(Don’t Fear) The Reaper” until I listened to it earlier this week. It was so subtle, it worked. Now, I can’t listen to the song without hearing the faint sound of the cowbell.
A cowbell does have a purpose, but there is one instance of the cowbell that should be eliminated for eternity – at sporting events (The airhorn also belongs in this category, along with an overzealous bald guy playing music and announcing each goal like it is Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final).
In recent weeks, I have attended two hockey tournaments that my sons were playing in, both of which prominently featured this musical instrument/livestock tracking device within the confines of a small-town arena.
And more often than not, I find it is the teams that easily win games that are guilty of using cowbell, airhorns, etc.
I witnessed several games in the past two weeks where it was, by definition, a blow out – the score so lopsided that the clock ran on straight time, the game so one-sided it appeared the ice was slanted toward the losing team’s net. Some games were getting to the point where most people would feel awkward cheering when it becomes a 7-0 game.
Not the cowbell clangers.
They were just as loud, just as energetic… and just as obnoxious as they were when it was 1-0.
Don’t get me wrong, I believe everyone has the right to cheer or boo a play or celebrate a goal. That’s what we do as fans. However, we also tell our kids not to “hotdog” – or “read the room” as the kids say – after scoring a goal when the game is out of reach. Yet here are the parents of those same kids, rattling the cowbell like a bull is out having a good time in the pasture with a heifer.
Thankfully, my kids don’t play on one of those teams – neither a team that blows opponents out, or are card-carrying members of the Cowbell Clangers of Canada. Any time we do play against a team of cowbell carriers, the first comment the kids make after leaving the ice is, “Those cowbells are SO annoying and obnoxious.”
It’s a sentiment parents share as well.
And there is no greater feeling than facing a cowbell team and scoring the first goal, and the second goal, and seeing those cowbells get set down. It can only be bettered by entering an arena, such as the Davidson Centre in Kincardine, that proudly displays a sign that says, “No cowbells or airhorns permitted.”
Just what the doctor ordered.
Indeed, I’ve got a fever, and the only prescription… is less cowbell!
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Mike Wilson is the editor of Midwestern Newspapers. Comments and feedback are welcome at mwilson@midwesternnewspapers.com.
