It’s no secret that I’m not the most patient person, especially with myself. I can appreciate anyone who, like me, wrestles with wanting results right now but has to wait – and work – for them instead.
I can completely relate to the frustration that comes when you are doing everything right and still not getting the results you were hoping for, in the timeframe that you thought you should.
A recent lifting competition I participated in highlighted my impatience. In the weeks leading up to it, I did everything my coach asked me to do; I made sacrifices to ensure I didn’t miss a single training session, I ate all the right foods to ensure my body was fueled well, I made sure I got enough sleep and water and repair time, and I even did the mental rehearsal necessary to do well.
When I stepped out on the platform, I missed my first lift. Though I hit my next one, I missed the last one, leaving my lift total lower than I knew I was capable of. The next three lifts went much the same way. This is a part of the sport. Sometimes you hit the lift, and sometimes you don’t, even if you know you can and think you should, and did everything you were supposed to.
Though I walked away with a silver medal, I also walked away impatient with myself because I hadn’t got the results I wanted to get fast enough. I knew I was capable of more, but that more that I was capable of had yet to be seen, and required I move ahead with patience and persistence.
As I’ve gone back to the lifting table, I’ve been trying hard to take my coaches advice with me: “You need to be patient. The results you are hoping for will come but the timeline isn’t up to you, so you simply must keep working until you get there.”
As I’ve reflected, I’ve asked the question – what if there was a reason for the wait? I already know the answer. There is and I believe it’s one worth waiting for.
When we try to microwave our results, take shortcuts to get there quickly, or impatiently expect them to happen for us right away, what winds up happening is we force things and miss the important steps necessary to help us be able to stay where we are racing to get to.
If I want to catch the weights on competition day that I know I can, I can’t rush the process. I need to patiently put the lighter reps in and inch my way up the staircase, rather than race up and skip some steps along the way.
If I skip over the boring, monotonous work, I won’t get there because that work builds the habits I’ll need to have in place in order to stay where I’m wanting to reach. And, if I try to rush it, I won’t be equipped to stay there when I finally reach the goal.
This reminds me of working with clients who have a weight loss goal. When someone sets out to achieve weight loss, there is a learning process that takes place that is extremely important. Equally important is the unlearning that happens.
It is an uphill climb and each step towards the final destination is just as important as that destination, because with each step, there is learning and unlearning that will help keep the weight off once they’ve lost it.
They learn what works for their body, what doesn’t, what habits and patterns need to be broken, and which ones need to replace the old, unhealthy ones. They also learn that even when life happens, and things come along that could derail them, or the scale doesn’t reflect how hard they worked last week, they need to stay the course and keep focused on the goal of living a healthier lifestyle, no matter what.
The timeline may not be up to us, but how we handle the timeline is. We can impatiently throw ourselves into getting the results we want, or we can persistently and patiently keep working even if we don’t get them right away. Ultimately, the work is not in vain because the lessons learned along the way are lessons we will need once we get to where we wish.
A person with a weight loss goal cannot lose all the weight and then expect to keep that weight off while reverting back to their old habits and unhealthy lifestyle. They’ll need the new habits they’ve formed along the way in order to maintain their new healthy weight.
There is something to gain from the wait, that a rush to the goal wouldn’t teach us. What that is for me is yet to be found but once I have it, I’m certain the numbers I’ve been wanting to reach will be replaced with a brand-new set of heavier numbers and I’ll be able to maintain them because I’ll have learned how to do that.
Whatever your goal is, be patient and trust the process, even if it’s not linear or as fast as you’d like, and even if you don’t quite understand it yet. Good things come to those who work hard while they’re waiting.
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Alison Brown is a local business owner, mother and published author.