The TV was too loud. My boys like it that way, but I don’t.
As the noise filled my home, the frustration about the decibel level was building inside of me. I was aware of the tension in my hands and shoulders as I cleaned our kitchen in preparation for dinner.
They rarely watch TV and when they do, it’s usually some kind of nature show, so even though the noise was bothering me, I didn’t want to tell them to turn it off or even down. I felt like I should just be able to bend a bit on this one. As I cleaned, I kept justifying why I let the noise stay in my home.
When my husband arrived on the scene, I vented my frustration.
“The television is driving me crazy!”
I’m a bit more emotional. He’s a bit more practical. Both are valuable and balance our lives and home quite well.
This time though, practicality was needed, and I was thankful for his common sense. He said calmly, “You have the off switch.”
He was right. I did. The off switch was in my hands, not literally, but ultimately I was in charge of how loud I let the TV get, or whether it was even on to begin with.
His words gave me the permission I didn’t actually need, to do what I should have done to begin with. As I turned the volume down, I felt my shoulders drop and my frustration immediately dissipate. I then realized how ridiculous it was that I had let something as small as the TV affect my mood and physical body, all while I had the power to control it.
Later that night I reflected on why I hadn’t just turned the volume down sooner. I’m not normally so accommodating of noise and I rarely wait so long to act when I am frustrated about something.
I also reflected on what I could learn from this situation and how it may be symbolic for what other noise I am allowing in my life.
I then realized just how frustrated I was feeling about the state of our world right now. I have friends getting shunned and uninvited to family gatherings for making different choices than their loved ones.
When a friend of mine hugged a woman who had just lost her husband to an awful disease, I watched a passerby make an angry face for the hug he was witnessing.
Much like the volume of our TV, the state of our world is driving me crazy. I wish people would be kinder, love more, judge less, point fingers less and unite rather than divide. Life is too short to be arguing over tiny stuff that in the grand scheme of things really isn’t all that significant.
Then I thought of how good it felt to turn the volume down and I realized this: The volume, the mute button, the off switch to all the stuff in our life that may be driving us crazy – they really are all in our hands.
Don’t let the frustration build inside you so much that you forget the power you actually hold. Don’t like the crazy in the world right now? (That makes two of us)
Guess what though? We can take a break from it. We can change the channel to a more positive one, to one that makes a difference for the better.
We can scroll on by to something beautiful instead. We can choose what fills our minds.
We get to decide what we watch, how loud it gets, and whether or not it gets to have space in our life at all.
If things are too loud right now, turn the volume down or turn it all off entirely. Take a break; do a yoga class, go for a nature walk, let the laundry wait and take a hot bath instead. Enjoy some much needed quiet time for yourself. You have my permission, even though you don’t need permission at all.
Do whatever you need to do to let your shoulders drop and the frustration melt away because in order for you to be good for everyone who needs and loves you, you need to decide you’re worth turning the volume down for. Sometimes accommodating noise is also sacrificing your own well-being and that’s not healthy for anyone.
If life is too loud right now and it’s filling your home to the point of driving you crazy, guess what? You have the off switch. Using it doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you a wise one instead.
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This is a monthly opinion piece; Alison Brown is a local business owner, mother and published author.
